Let’s Talk About Camming, Baby!
U Ask:
Hi Angie,
I’ve been reading your site for a while now, and I’m keen to try my hand out at camming! The only problem is I’m not sure how to even bring up the topic with my partner of 5 years and I don’t expect he’d be too happy about the idea of me performing for other men. Do you have any advice?
How does your camming job factor into your own personal relationship, do you find that this type of work puts a strain on your relationship with your partner at all?
I Answer:
You are definitely not alone in this conundrum, and I’m so glad you raised the question! Even in a healthy and loving relationship, bringing up controversial topics can feel awkward or scary.
What if he judges me? What if he sees me differently somehow? What if he gets angry, and – worse-case-scenario (somehow I always end up there in my head lol) – what if he leaves?
The reality is that most of this inner dialogue and anxiety is unfounded and irrational, and most people are actually more open-minded than we think they are. True, there are many people who would hear webcam modeling and think prostitution – not that prostitution is intrinsically wrong, but that it carries a long-held social stigma that is very hard for us to get past as a society.
My advice? Bring up the general subject in a theoretical, conversational kind of way just to gauge his reaction.
“Hey, so I was reading this thing online about a webcam model that made A LOT of money recently from a big spender! It was in a CNET article.” 
Try humour:
“I should be a webcam model so we can be rich / live it up / go on a cruise!”
Note his reaction.
If he’s responding positively to the general idea, throw it out there: “No seriously, what would you think if I wanted to make money with my vagina?” (Remember, humour is magic here lol)
Then it’s out there. If he seems cool with that, then sign up for an account and let him know that you did. Consider letting him take some sexy photos of you to keep him involved. When he sees the lingerie and costumes that you’ll be working in, he just might be totally cool with it. 
If he has reservations, remind him that you are 100% his and this “experiment” would just be for the money.
Ultimately it has to be your decision. If your partner is not okay with this idea, then it becomes a choice of partner vs. opportunity. Definitely not an ideal situation, but it all comes down to your priorities and what is most important to you in your life.
I was lucky to have my boyfriend bring up the subject first.
He was actually considering becoming a webcam model himself, and that’s how I learned about the job! I did some research and realized it looked seriously sweet, so I basically just said that. I took some sexy pictures and signed up for 5 Points, then I said I think I’m gonna give this a try for real. He’s been totally supportive through the whole process.
Me being a webcam model is actually a pretty cool part of our relationship. I get all dolled up and sexy and Luke says how much of a tease I am. He knows that I’m all his at the end of the night, but right now this sexy lady’s gotta go make some money.
Occasionally when I’ve done a really long hardcore show, it will put a little bit of a strain on our relationship when I’m not interested in having actual sex and he’s all worked up after hearing me work (I’m a little noisy haha). But Luke understands, and I just remind him of all the dollars I just made for us. It’s ultimately a win and a healthy situation for both of us.
When I get online I am playing a character, a version of me cranked up to 11, and Luke knows this. So when it comes to jealousy, it’s just not a thing. I can talk about my shows and my customers, and with Luke I always refer to them by their screen names so it’s totally impersonal. My job has made for some seriously fun conversations.
My fans can fantasize about me all they want, but Luke knows I’m all his and that’s the most important thing to us both. He also loves bragging to his friends online about how he’s “dating an adult model.” He’s like, score! lol
The story will of course vary from couple to couple and I’ll be talking more about webcam modeling in the context of relationships in the future. Let me know if there’s anything else I can help with in the meantime, and thanks for reading U Camgirl!
Thank You For Sharing
Thank you for sharing this post. We really do appreciate it!
Angie
About Author
Angie
I'm a 26 year old Canadian, musician, and camgirl. I quit my day job in July 2013 thanks to webcam modeling, and I created U Camgirl to share what I've learned along the way. I'm here to answer questions and help anyone interested in pursuing webcam work.
I think provided you aren’t involved in a religious organization or other socially discriminating group most people don’t mind the idea. I’ve had friends over the years who bragged about how they were dating escorts and they didn’t have to pay for the pleasures. It’s all psychological and up to the individuals involved. I think if you are that unlike minded regarding occupation then you should really talk about the other multitude of hidden differences you are hiding from in your relationship, no?
I couldn’t agree more, Rob. I would even venture further into that thought and wonder… if it’s that hard to bring up the subject with your partner, what other issues are suffering from lack of communication? Thanks very much for your comment on this topic!
Interesting post Angie! That was cool to hear a real life example of how it all works for you – I’m sure a lot of people will find this info really helpful.
Like you said, I guess people are usually more reasonable than you would think, and there’s no reason not to discuss it like adults.
I think being open with your partner about something like this is certainly required rather than keeping it a secret, which could only lead to trouble at some point..
Thanks Jolie! Absolutely, open communication is so important in relationships and talking about stuff like this is no exception. Glad you found this one interesting.
Cheers